Equanimity

So we’re staring down the new year and blogs are popping up the question of New Year’s Resolutions. They’ve never been a big thing for me. Occasionally I do a dry January but that’s about as far as I go. But Dan Pink’s suggestion looked interesting:

Here are the steps:
1. Look back on the previous year. New Year’s resolutions begin with old year’s regrets.
2. Fill in the blank: “If only I _______________.”
3. Make a long list of your If Only regrets.
4. Pick the one — and only one — that bugs you the most.
5. Make that — and only that — your New Year’s resolution. Less is more.
6. Put an action plan into place by setting private commitments on the even-numbered days of January.
7. Tell others what you’re doing so they can hold you accountable.

I particularly like the idea of picking just one.
So here goes starting with the usual suspects:

• If only I cut down on the bread, my tummy wouldn't be so gripey.
• If only I drank less wine, I would have fewer headaches.
• If only I did more stretching exercise, my body would be less achey.
• If only I was less irritable with the important people in my life.
• If only I valued my own work more, I would be less liable to give up.

And the winner is…. being less irritable.

My family keep me waiting — for meals, for outings, when I ask for help. And I am always ready and champing and then I think it is my god given right to get irritable and angry because besides the food getting cold/dry, the movie having started, our hosts waiting, they are wasting my life.

People do what the do, because they don’t know what else to do.

So I need to find another way to deal with these gaps, these holes of inaction and stewing.
I’m thinking that since I spend so much time in my head, and these gosh-darn gaps are in the interest of spending quality time with people, maybe I need to find a way out of my head, and pursue sensation. So what about using these intervals to spend deliberate, quality time with my pets?
I could also use them for stretching, spending time in my own body.
Mmmmm food for thought… or action — but definitely not for irritation.